A Life of Balance

Hey all, I’m having quite a few realizations whilst abroad. I’m grateful. The principal realization is that I surround myself with literature about social issues (e.g. race and gender and their impact on one’s lived experiences). For me, it is part of social justice work that I would like to engage myself with in the future. I also want to understand the experiences of other marginalized/minority groups, as I think this will make me a better physician and human generally. Anyway, although I think it is important to surround myself with such issues, I think it can also have a damaging effect on one’s health. It’s really draining, especially when I cannot ‘turn myself off’ and relive the emotions I feel when engrossing myself in such literature during my daily life.

So, on the way to Toronto, I was having lunch at the airport and I was very uncomfortable. As a visible and brown Muslim, I felt on edge at the airport a little. I actualized that a small percentage of me is always away from the present moment – pre-empting a racist or Islamophobic attack. I realized that this was commonplace for me and that I wasn’t content with that; it was emotionally draining. We ended up getting profiled at the airport and it was a horrific affair – mentally, anyway. I think I’m going to write about it in more detail in another blog, however. After writing this part of the blog, I realized I really want to share these experiences with others, as I feel that many (especially white people) do not understand such discrimination still exists. How are they supposed to support their fellow man if they have not identified a problem?

Moreover, I find it difficult being in the moment generally. I live in the future. I’ve always thought it was important to live in the future because I associated one’s preparedness with academic and professional success, which, for me, is true and has worked! However, I also need to live in the present, as simple as that sounds, in order to enjoy the journey. I see that I’m very much living in the future and, thus, not acknowledging the journey. I’m hustling in the journey without acknowledging the bigger picture whilst hustling, in essence. Thus, near the end of life, I really do not think that I would look back on life happily if always lived in the future. It doesn’t sound very enjoyable, right?

Anyway, that’s it for now. I’m going to jump into some social science writings. I also really want to read Reni Eddo-Lodge’s book . Will see you soon, y’all; peace x

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